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This is the first photo of my daughter Natasha. She was sick and in a hospital crib taking a nap. The orphanage lawyer had traveled with me and my translator from the orphanage to hear my answer. Would I accept the referral and adopt this child?
Would I adopt this squinty eyed (another word for crossed eyes), developmentally delayed, gray skin, drooling child? You cannot see in the photo but she was drooling on her pillow. *
I looked at this child and the only thought that I remember… “I can do this.” There was no love-at-first-sight. I watched her drool and then told my translator that I would adopt this child.
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I have struggled to describe this moment of decision. I was numb and not feeling any emotion. Underneath this numbness I was very nervous scared. And she was the first child who met my criteria. I wanted a girl with correctable issues who was 3.5 years of age or older.
I watched this child ASLEEP for about 5 seconds and then agreed to the adoption. Many Most families are more cautious.
Families will see the child moving, walking and talking (sometimes singing) before agreeing to adoption. And some families ask for an international adoption doctor to look at the referral before deciding to adopt. Typically the family sends pictures and emails to the doctor based in the US. But sometimes the family will hire a doctor in Ukraine to travel to the orphanage to exam the child.
When I stated that I would adopt Natasha, the older children in the room (Natasha had roommates in her hospital room.) starting yelling and jumping up and down. The 14 year old roommate shook Natasha awake yelling at her that “Mama” had arrived.
Natasha woke up with a sleepy and puzzled look on her face. She figured out that she was suppose to be excited. But what in the world was a “Mama”?
Here are some photos of my darling that shows Natasha’s physical progress over 11 months. She was adopted in December 2000.
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* Natasha was at a specialized orphanage. This can be translated to handicapped orphange. After listening to the orphanage lawyer and orphanage inspector during the adoption hearing, the judge had one question about Natasha’s developmental delays.
“Can she walk or talk?”
She was 3.5 years old but probably had the language of a 2-year old child. Her gross and fine motor skills were greatly delayed because of her crossed eyes.
Accepting a Referral
Love and Accepting a Referral
Accepting the Referral for My Daughter
Accepting a Referral: Other Families Stories Part 1
Accepting a Referral: Other Families Stories Part 2
Accepting a Referral: Other Families Stories Part 3
